What is trust?

A new manager recently asked me, "How do I build trust in the organization?" After a few seconds' thought, my answer was "How do you define trust?"

We often talk about trust as though it's a property of a person.

I trust Alice

But what we usually mean is that we trust them in a specific situation.

I trust Alice to do X when Y happens

Alice might be your go-to person for producing a high quality report and the last person you would ask to feed your cat while you are on vacation. Trust depends on the person, behaviour, and context.

After talking it through, we landed on the following definition of trust:

Trust is the confidence that you can rely on someone in a particular situation when the stakes are high

Can we rely on you?

Trust isn't static. Every interaction we have with each other provides another data point to be considered. Imagine this situation:

• I write a proposal
• Someone comments with a challenging question and I engage in good faith
• It happens again, and I engage in good faith again

People will start to rely on that pattern. They build a shortcut in their mind in the I trust Michael to do X when Y happens format. Here, they expect me to engage in good faith when someone challenges a proposal.

Our whole lives are built on these small mental models that others build of us. A situation happens, people observe what we do and update their prediction of how we'll respond in the future.

Trust is tested when it has a cost

The context around a behaviour matters. If you're open and collaborative in your team meetings, but try to control the conversation when there's a senior person in the room, people will learn that "they're collaborative when the risks are low" rather than "they're collaborative".

People pay particular attention to your behaviour when it costs you something:

• You're calm when a project is failing in addition to when things are going well
• You admit a mistake when your reputation is on the line as well as when it's inconsequential
• You behave the same when your boss is in the room as when they're not

If you invite disagreement ten times, but chastise someone for challenging you when your boss is in the room, people learn that you're only open to ideas in certain situations.

Becoming trustworthy

Going back to the original question, the new manager wanted to know how to get the organisation to trust them. We can work backwards from the situations in which they need people to rely on them.

What do I want people to be able to predict about my behaviour?

We came up with these examples:

• When I make a commitment, I'll hit the date. If there is a risk, I'll raise it early and agree next steps
• When I don't know the answer, I'll say that I don't know
• When someone tells me bad news, I won't punish the messenger. We work through the problem together
• When someone has an idea, we assume it's possible and explore if we should make it a reality

These behaviours are observable. If you say you want people to suggest ideas and shoot down every idea with "we've tried that before" or "that'll never work because...", people will stop suggesting ideas.

When trust becomes organisationally useful

Trust also affects how organisations work. Take this target behaviour as an example:

When someone tells me bad news, I won't punish the messenger. We work through the problem together

If you respond constructively when someone brings you bad news, they will come to believe that telling you will help. They will bring you bad news sooner. The sooner you know the bad news, the easier it is to correct course and get a positive outcome for the business and the people involved.

When people know they can rely on your response, they can take the risk of being honest with you.

What happens next

Other people decide whether they can rely on you based on what they have seen you do.

Saying "I want you to challenge me" tells people your intentions. How you respond when challenged tells them what you value.

To build a high-trust organisation, ask yourself: What have people seen me do often enough that they are willing to bet I will do it again?